religiouspunk:

girl are you trash because i want to take you out

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parents: honey, it's time for the sex talk
me: what do you wanna know
April  17   ( 418065 )   via   +

hitlersasshole:

I burn like 2000 calories everytime i put my bed sheets on by myself

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wonderful-roses:

=

April  17   ( 2811 )   via   /   source   +

drunktrophywife:

dennys:

"It’s a metaphor, see. You put the bacon thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the…um…well, you eat it, actually, ‘cause it’s there and you’re nearly tasting it. So it’s not a metaphor. Um. I have no idea where I was going with that. Want some bacon?"

I’m deleting

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HW