parents: honey, it's time for the sex talk
me: what do you wanna know
April  17   ( 355396 )   via   +

hitlersasshole:

I burn like 2000 calories everytime i put my bed sheets on by myself

April  17   ( 185239 )   via   /   source   +
April  17   ( 143879 )   via   /   source   +

wonderful-roses:

=

April  17   ( 2687 )   via   /   source   +

drunktrophywife:

dennys:

"It’s a metaphor, see. You put the bacon thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the…um…well, you eat it, actually, ‘cause it’s there and you’re nearly tasting it. So it’s not a metaphor. Um. I have no idea where I was going with that. Want some bacon?"

I’m deleting

April  17   ( 16115 )   via   /   source   +
April  17   ( 91844 )   via   /   source   +
April  17   ( 160666 )   via   +
April  17   ( 176021 )   via   +
April  17   ( 14100 )   via   /   source   +

coolscar:

coolscar:

i think im gonna lay down…………

THE LAW! you all thought i was going to bed! justice never sleeps, haha suckers

April  17   ( 93785 )   via   /   source   +
HW